Do You Suffer From Proseucheglossophobia?

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Do your hands start to sweat and your heart start to pound when Bible study moves on to “Prayer Time”? 

Do you find yourself reaching a near-panic state as the group leader looks around for “someone to close us in prayer”? 

Do you miss out on half of the spoken prayers because you are berating yourself for not speaking out to uphold a friend in prayer, running through all of the reasons that everyone is better off if you DON’T open your mouth, vowing to pray TWICE AS HARD tonight before you go to sleep to make up for not participating YET AGAIN in the prayer circle?

If any of these situations come close to your own, you may in fact suffer from proseucheglossophobia.

[That’s pros-yoo-khay-glos-o-fo-bee-ya.]

The term may be fiction, but the malady is all too real.

Experts estimate that as much as 75% of the population experience glossophobia, or the fear of speaking in public, to some extent.  I’ve added “proseuche” to that term to represent the fear of PRAYING in public, because “proseuchomai” in Greek means “to offer prayers.” 

Hence, proseucheglossophobia, is the fear of praying in public.  Say it ten times fast.  (Just not in public!)

I’m no psychologist, and cannot offer an analysis of why so many of us are afraid to pray out loud in front of people.  But, as a fellow phobic who has come far in overcoming the limits of that fear, I CAN share with you my own path to breaking free (a little bit!) from the phobia.

Pray About It!

Whenever I am facing some difficulty in my life, or working on some area of weakness, the first thing I try to do is to take my effort to God. 

I take seriously the passages in the Bible that remind me that my help comes from the Lord (Psalm 121:2), and that I can do little apart from Him (John 15:5).  I take seriously the reminders that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippans 4:13).  I take seriously the promises that a fervent prayer can accomplish a lot (James 5:16). 

When I noticed that I was having so much trouble praying out loud in front of people, and that I just couldn’t bring myself to participate during prayer times, I asked God to help me to overcome my fear.  I asked Him to remind me to focus on my conversation with Him, rather than putting my focus on how I might look or sound to the people listening to me.  I asked Him to remind me that my ego was so much less important than the work that I should be doing to bring the requests and needs of loved ones to Him in prayer.

Pray With Your Children

I knew that I couldn’t teach my children how to pray without modeling prayer in front of them, and I couldn’t very well close my eyes and bow my head and sit in silence, expecting them to learn anything about prayer from that. 

I started using a little book of devotions with them, and said aloud the one-line prayer provided in each day’s passage.  As I got more comfortable hearing my own voice, and as I thought of more things I wanted to pray for in front of my children, I prayed a little more “off-the-cuff,” using the pre-printed prayer as the first line, and adding additional thoughts of my own. 

Similarly at night before bed, I started with a one-sentence prayer, thanking God for our day and asking Him to protect us as we sleep.  Over time, I started adding to the prayer, asking for His blessings for our family, thanking Him for the day’s food and our home, asking for healing or comfort for some member of the family whom the girls knew was facing an illness or injury.  Then I added, “Please forgive us for our sins, and help us to make good choices.”  Occasionally, the girls ask me to pray for something, like a tummy ache or a cut on their finger or summertime mosquito bites. 

I found that praying aloud with my children was a very low-pressure, low-stress approach to getting comfortable with the overall idea of praying in front of others.  I started with a feeling of obligation (“I really NEED to be doing this for the spiritual development of my girls!”), and I started small (“They can only sit still for a sentence or two, so that’s where we’ll begin.”), and from there I got more comfortable, started to involve them in the content of the prayer, and added to the length of what I had to say. 

I think one reason this step helped me in my development as an “out-loud pray-er” is that with children I HAD to keep my words simple and my thoughts clear.  If I sat there and started praying about holiness and  sanctification, and “thou art,” and “thy sovereign this or that,” it would have turned me tongue-tied, and utterly confused the kids!  And once I started praying in front of other people—grown-ups—I didn’t see any real reason to switch gears and pull out the fancy Christian vocabulary. 

God knows my heart, and He knows what I’m trying to say, and if I’m going to bother speaking those thoughts aloud, they might as well be understandable!  God gave me this voice, and I try to pray aloud with the same voice I use when I pray inside my head.  There is no need for me to try to sound like anyone other than myself. 

Pay Attention

When I started to recognize that praying out loud is a skill, something that I could learn, I started really listening to people whose prayers I admired.  I started paying attention to how they began their prayers, how they addressed God, and what they said first.  I listened for the words and phrases they used to pray for people who needed healing, comfort, or encouragement.  I took note of what they said to bring their prayers to a close.  It was almost like I was creating a “word bank” in my mind with words and phrases I could use in my own prayers.  I could always hear if the things that other were saying didn’t sound like ME, though, and, as I said above, I always pray in my own voice, rather than taking on the voice of someone else I’ve heard as a prayer model.

Put Yourself in Positions Where You HAVE To Do It

I found myself in the position of leading one of the Bible study/prayer circles at my church.  I COULDN’T back out of praying now!  It was in MY job description (so to speak) to open our meetings in prayer, and to start off our prayer time at the end.  Yikes!  It was “do or die,” to put it melodramatically.  Facing this didn’t mean the phobia disappeared, not by a long shot, but it put me in a position where I could not avoid facing my phobia, and I had to figure out how to overcome it (by the means described above) in order to not be miserable internally and do what I considered would be a disservice to the women in my circle.

Avoid Comparisons To Others

More than anything, overcoming a fear of praying in front of others requires us to get rid of this pervasive and so-damaging practice of comparing ourselves to others. If it is truly just me talking to my Heavenly Father, why would I ever fear?  But when you add a handful of women to the equation, some of whom look like Giants of the Faith compared to where I am on my own faith journey, women who open their mouths and pour out eloquence in support of their sisters’ concerns and challenges, women who can incorporate scripture to support their requests…well, you can feel the pressure mounting as well as I can, can’t you?

But the fact is, no matter who is sitting in that room with you, your conversation is truly between you and God.  The rest of us sitting there are in solidarity with you.  Do you REALLY think that while you lift up your brother in Christ facing heart surgery or your sister in Christ trying to extract herself from an abusive relationship that someone in your circle is internally critiquing your word choice or snorting that you stuttered AGAIN?  And if they are, then woe to them, not to you!  Praying is not a competitive sport.  Some people will have a smoother delivery with finer words and deeper thoughts.  Others will be more stilted and halting.  All are approaching the throne of grace with confidence (Hebrews 4:6), following Jesus’ example and obeying God’s command to pray. 

You're Not Alone!

If you are nervous or fearful about praying out loud in front of others, be aware that you are in good company.  I found online references to “praying out loud” workshops to help people get more comfortable doing it.  Some pastors feel uncomfortable praying out loud, even though it is a fundamental part of their job description!

The most encouraging thing to keep in mind that praying out loud is a skill that you CAN learn, and its potential for allowing you to bless others makes it a skill worth developing. 

Making Sense of the Bible

The title of my post is a little grandiose perhaps.  I don’t think I will actually be offering you a magic key to unlock all of the mysteries of the Bible.  Only God Himself and some really diligent reading and praying are likely to do that for you!  But I do have a couple more thoughts that I want to share as you continue your commitment to spend time each day in God’s Word.

I think many of us have sat down to re-enter Bible reading, only to open up the Book and find the words too unfamiliar, the sentences too complex, and the people and place names too strange to wade through.  Try to choose a translation of the Bible that makes enough sense to you to be worthwhile.  I have always used the New International Version.  I’ve heard plenty of criticism of that version, and lots of alternatives, but it is a translation that I am familiar and comfortable with.  You can talk to friends, family members, or a pastor to get their translation recommendations.  Check out different translations from the library to see what you are comfortable with.  For me, the King James Version is too difficult to understand, and The Message is too subjective and colloquial.  These are my personal opinions, and there are people who will read nothing but the King James Version, or who feel as though The Message has brought them back to God’s Word for the first time in years.  The decision ultimately lies with you, and I recommend spending time in prayer, asking God to help direct you to the translation through which He can most effectively communicate with you.

Though it’s definitely not necessary, you might consider reading a Bible that leads you through the whole text in a year.  (It doesn’t mean, by the way, that you have to make it through in one year.  You may miss some days, or decide to read at a slower pace.)  Some of these “Bibles-in-a-year” will give you a selection of passages each day—perhaps an Old Testament passage, a Psalm, a reading from the Gospels, and a passage from the New Testament letters.  I’ve tried this approach and found it to be too choppy for my taste.  Right now, I am reading The One Year Chronological Bible, published by Tyndale House, and it works great for me.  The selections are a good length, and allow me to read a chunk of text without jumping from place to place.  I am not left to determine how much of the Bible I “should” be reading each day; it’s like a homework assignment, which a bookworm, schoolmarm-type like me responds to positively.  As I will point out again and again, what works best for me may not work best for you, so it may take some trial and error to find out what suits your lifestyle and personality.  If you’re spending time with the Bible each day trying to figure out what works best for you, then that time of experimenting with book types and translations will not be a “waste of time,” and I firmly believe that God will bless your efforts.

I have found children’s Bibles to be a great resource for my own Bible study, too.  I gave my daughter the Adventure Bible for Early Readers (Zonderkidz) for her 6^th birthday.  Its target audience is six- to nine-year olds.  As I struggled through the Book of Proverbs last month, I picked up her edition and found Solomon’s wisdom much more understandable when directed toward a younger reader.  During Sunday school last week, as my co-teacher did a lesson for fourth graders on the Beatitudes in the Book of Matthew, I found that the Adventures in Odyssey Bible (Focus on the Family) gave a very helpful translation of just exactly whom Jesus was blessing by his words.  (Haven’t you wondered?  Just who exactly are the “poor in spirit,” and why are they so blessed?  Pick up a children’s Bible to find out!)

And a final thought, which comes with a “Major Personal Opinion Alert”:  I would caution you against using daily devotion books to the exclusion of reading the Bible.  For example, if you read a page from Our Daily Bread or Jesus Calling or Encouragement for Today, but never open the Word of God itself, I think you are missing out on an important resource that God has given to His children.  These devotions usually present a single verse from the Bible, along with a story, commentary, and prayer that are related to it.  If you truly hold onto that Bible verse throughout the day, and apply it to your thinking and actions throughout, then I am certainly not suggesting that quantity trumps quality and you should try to read more, more, more.  But if you skim through the verse, and read through the text, and go on with your day without giving it a second thought, then I think you might be better served to read more of God’s Own Word, and less of men’s and women’s thoughts and commentary about God’s Word.  If you disagree, I am happy to hear your reasons (communicated respectfully, please!) so that no one who might be blessed by these sorts of devotional books is  pulled away from them by what I’ve said here.  I think they can be an inspiring supplement to your reading of the Bible, just not a substitute. 

If any of these suggestions work for you, if you have any questions, or if you have other advice or suggestions about making Bible reading and study an everyday part of your life, please let us know in the comments!

Incorporating Bible Reading Into Your Day

One of the major ways I build and maintain my relationship with God is by spending time reading and studying the Bible.  It has not always been a daily discipline for me, and even now there are days here and there when I miss out.  I’ve come a long way, though, towards making God’s Word part of my daily reading. 

In this post, I want to share a list of ideas for incorporating Bible reading into your day.  Not all of them will be relevant to your circumstances, but I am hoping that a few of them might prove helpful.  Some are strategies that I have used, and others have come from my reading over the years.

The most difficult times to fit Bible reading—or any reading, for that matter—into your day is when you have young children at home.  Here are some ideas specific to parents with little ones:

1.      Lead everyone in your family to have a devotional time at once.  Give your small children Bible storybooks and picture books, along with notebooks they can scribble their own “notes” in.  For some kids, a little spiral notebook feels like a special treasure instead of the usual big sheets of coloring paper they are used to. 

 

Set a timer, and let your children know, “When the timer goes ‘ding,’ I will read a story to you, but for now, it is everyone’s quiet time to spend with God.”

 

You will have to explain, model, and reinforce the behaviors you expect during this time just as you would when teaching any other appropriate behaviors for a given time and place.

2.      Even if your children have outgrown naptime, you can still have them observe a “quiet time,” when they are expected to read, draw, or play quietly in their rooms.  

Again, you will have to explain, model, and reinforce the behaviors you expect during this time.  “Quiet time” might not be all that quiet and Bible-directed while you are reinforcing that your children cannot keep popping out of their rooms to ask you a question or look for a different toy.  Use the same sorts of methods you employ to keep them in their rooms at night, and after some time you may find some fairly uninterrupted periods of morning or afternoon time for your devotions.

3.     Work with your husband to find a task that he can do with the kids on his own to free you up for a devotional time.  Perhaps he can brush teeth, give baths, oversee the putting on of pajamas, and read the nighttime books while you have your quiet time, and then you can come in for prayer, tuck ins, and kisses.  Or he could take them to the park, the library, or (even better!) the grocery store once a week so you can have an uninterrupted hour to yourself.

4.     Let your children see you read the Bible.  You don’t have to hide yourself away for devotional time, as long as you can find a way to be undisturbed.  It sets a great example, and makes them curious.

Here are some suggestions that could work for anyone at any point in her life:

1.      Read just a little before you go to sleep at night, or in the morning before anyone else is awake, depending on your own sleeping habits. 

2.      Find a time when you would usually pick up a magazine or scroll through Facebook (your lunch break at work, perhaps?), and pick up the Bible instead. 

 

3.      Keep a calendar of your Quiet Time reading to mark your progress.  Elizabeth George includes a Quiet Times Calendar in the back of her book, A Woman After God’s Own Heart.  You can shade in a square for each day you spend some time with God.  My daughter has a similar chart to this for her kindergarten class, so she can mark off every fifteen minute increment of reading she does each day.  Such a visual record may encourage you to be more faithful to your commitment.

4.       Tell other people about your intention to spend time in the Bible each day.  Knowing that they will ask you about your progress may offer additional incentive to keep up your commitment.

“What happens when you and I do slip away to be with God in study and prayer?” asks Elizabeth George in A Woman After God’s Own Heart.

“We receive,” she writes.  “We take in.  We are nurtured and fed…I call this time with God ‘the great exchange.’ Away from the world and hidden from public view, I exchange my weariness for His strength, my weakness for His power, my darkness for His light, my problems for His solutions, my burdens for His freedom, my frustrations for His peace, my turmoil for His calm, my hopes for His promises, my afflictions for His balm of comfort, my questions for His answers, my confusion for His knowledge, my doubt for His assurance, my nothingness for His awesomeness, the temporal for the eternal, and the impossible for the possible.”

Wow!  I think it’s clear that we get the best end of the bargain in this exchange, thanks be to God!

Making Time for God's Word

“I just don’t have time for Bible study and prayer.”

I’ve said these words before, and chances are you have, too.  Even with the best of intentions, we have a hard time finding space in our schedules for any time with God.  But if we are to maintain our relationship with Him, then we must make time for it.  We manage to make time for the things that matter to us…heck, we manage to make time for things that really don’t matter all that much to us!  Surely we can work together, and share some ideas here to make time for God.

We’ll tackle the subject of prayer in a different post; let’s focus on Bible reading and study for now. 

An Appointment with God

Jen Hatmaker tells us in 7:  An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess that her communion with God “suffers not for lack of desire but time.”  But then she reflects that she did find time for Facebook and television and YouTube videos and radio.  “So when I say I don’t have time,” she admits, “I’m a gigantic liar.  I have time.  I just spend it elsewhere.”  Ouch.  If we are honest, I think we are all convicted by these words.

Imagine that God called you up on the phone and asked you to set aside some time for Him.  He tells you that He wants to talk with you about your purpose in life, why you have been put here on earth, what He has created you to do, how you can handle those problems you are facing and deal with those people in your life.  Is that an appointment that you are likely to miss?

That is exactly what you are signing on for when you make an appointment to spend time in God’s Word.  It is in the Bible that you will find God’s purpose and will for you, as well as His direction and encouragement for handling the struggles you face due to circumstances and people in your life.  Knowing that His promises lie between the pages of that single book, the Bible, doesn’t it make sense to allow time each day to access them?

In Mindy Starns Clark’s book entitled The House That Cleans Itself, she dedicates an entire chapter to the topic of having a devotional area within your home.  “Going to God on a daily basis and keeping Him at the center of your heart and home is the key to lasting change,” Clark tells us.  

Practical Considerations

A good first step in incorporating Bible study into your schedule is to determine the best time to do it.  In the Old Testament, God required the “first fruits” from His people; He wants the BEST, not the second-hand or leftovers.  I think He probably feels the same way today.  When could you spend time with God’s Word when you would be giving it your full energy and attention? 

Many people like to begin their days with a time of prayer and Bible study to focus their attention on God for the day.  I love the idea of a morning devotional time, but it would not make for an effective experience for me.  I would be bleary-eyed and thinking about my first cup of coffee the whole time.  Lots of times I find myself reading my bible at 10:30 pm, knowing that I ought to be getting into the shower so I can get to bed.  For me, the best time for prayer and Bible study is around 8:30 pm.  Dinner is cleaned up, the kids are in bed, chores and appointments are finished for the day, and my husband is settled in to the computer or TV.  Nothing else is particularly pressing for me at this time of night, and I can focus on God’s Word.  What time would work best for you to be able to bring the first fruits of your energy and attention to God?

To make the most of your time, make sure to have all of your needed materials together in one place.  At the very least, this would mean keeping your Bible in easy reach of your pre-determined location.  Other possible additions include a notebook and pen for jotting down verses, ideas, and reflections; a reading schedule, if you are working your way through the Bible in one or two years; a devotional book, if you like reading daily selections with commentary; reference books, in case you are digging deep; highlighters, colored pencils, and colorful sticky notes if you are making notations in your Bible or notebook. 

But remember, nothing more is necessary for spending time in God’s Word than God’s Word itself…don’t make things so complicated that you never get started.  (Trust me, I am an EXPERT on making things complicated!)

If you DO end up with a collection of materials and supplies, keep them all together in a basket or tote bag.  That way, they don’t become a messy nuisance when you’re trying to keep the house neat, and you can easily move them from place to place if you have to change locations for Bible study one day.  I like to keep my things next to “my spot on the sofa” in the corner of the living room, but if I want to read the Bible while the television is on, I often pack up and head upstairs to my bedroom to find a quiet place.  I have to keep things portable so that I don’t throw my hands up and say, ”oh well” when my usual spot doesn’t encourage quiet time.

Clark encourages us to start small if we must, and God will bless our efforts.  Do you feel that five minutes is all that you can manage right now?  Well, that’s five more minutes in God’s Word than you managed yesterday, and over half an hour by the end of the week.  With prayer and commitment, you will likely see that time expand as you grow hungrier for more scripture.  In the classic book The Christian’s Secret of a Happy Life, Hannah Whitall Smith assures us, “Our part is the trusting; it is His to accomplish the results.  And when we do our part, He never fails to do His, for no one ever trusted in the Lord and was confounded.”  Show up, do your part, and God will bless your efforts.

Consider following Clark’s advice to set a timer for your reading time.  If you set the timer to “ding” after ten minutes, there is no reason to check the clock during your quiet, focused time with God.  Nor do you have to worry that you will “run over” your allotted time, taking you away from your To Do list.

The Bottom Line

Make an appointment with God, put it on the calendar if you must, get yourself prepared ahead of time so that you are not scurrying around looking for your Bible or a pen every day at the appointed time, commit yourself to a consistent practice of Bible reading, and reap the joyful benefits of spending time with your Creator.  If you don’t schedule it, it isn’t likely to happen. 

Don’t intend to do it. 

Make it happen. 

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My next post will share some specific ideas for  incorporating

Bible reading and study into your days.